Spring Break Revisited

After two months of interruptions, both of the good and the bad, I am quickly revisiting and tying up loose ends from our spring break trip in April . . .  

On Tuesday morning we headed over to Williamsburg for an afternoon in the 1700's. We began our adventure watching a Colonial movie and then wandering the streets of Virginia's Revolutionary capitol. We visited the shoemaker and the dressmaker, where the kids listened intently to the shop keepers and then in turn asked question after question. 

We listened to flute players, shopped in the outdoor market and tried out the pillory and stocks. 

We finally settled down with pecan pie and ginger cakes from the tavern as the afternoon historical reenactment took place. This day's theme was pre-revolutionary war events that took place in Williamsburg. We watched Patrick Henry shout, during a debate with loyalists, "Give me liberty or give me death." We listened to members of the House of Burgess's argue how much sympathy they should give Massachusetts after the Boston Tea Party, the shut down of the Boston Harbor and the Boston Massacre. And we witnessed the control that Governor Dunmore, the governor appointed by the King of England, had over the colonists. 

The two hour reenactment took place throughout several blocks of Williamsburg. Jonathan and Emilie raced from location to location to get the best seats for the next scene, while Annelise, Sophia and Ezra had different interests for the afternoon! 

We returned home for another night of swimming and then all climbed into bed, looking forward to our next day in Colonial Williamsburg.

On Wednesday we finished our trip back in Colonial times. We began the day touring the Governors Palace and it's beautiful gardens.

 We wandered through such buildings as the blacksmith and the Geddy House, which was Elizabeth's house in the American Girl books and attended a court hearing, dramatized after actual court documents from cases in the 1700's. 

As soon as the afternoon reenactments began, this time of the years during the war, Emilie and Jonathan's interest was piqued, while Annelise, Sophia and Ezra's interest began to fade. I took the little ones to see a children's museum, but before we could make our way there, there was a cloud burst, canceling all activities and causing the hundreds of visitors to run for cover. Our time at Williamsburg abruptly ended and we headed back to the condo for a movie, miniature golfing when the rain cleared and swimming. Despite the rain, the day was another success.

On Thursday we completed "America's Historic Triangle" with the day spent at Jamestown and Yorktown. At Jamestown we spent the morning in the Native American village. 

We then climbed aboard the ships that brought the English to their first permanent American settlement. 

Afterward we toured their simple homes and churches and even were lucky enough to watch a musket demonstration. 

Not far was the glass blowing house, which provided the settlement with their main commerce with England.

In the afternoon we made our way to Yorktown where the Revolutionary War ended. We visited the Victory Center and then wandered through a recreated Revolutionary War battlefield site with tents similar to what George Washington would have commanded from.

 

We found it particulary interesting to have learned about the end of the war after spending the past three years living almost on the battlefields where the war began.

We departed from our days of history and culture and headed to Busch Gardens for an entire day of wild rides and entertaining shows. As soon as we mentioned that we were adding an amusement park to the agenda, Jonathan began doing research. Immediately we heard about the Griffin, the "world's tallest and fastest dive machine" and it's 71 mph 205 foot drop. It did not disappoint. We have heard about it ever since. Annelise's highlight of the day was being chosen from the audience to join the German polka dancers on stage, with Sophia joining soon after. Ezra loved the kiddie rides. 

With short lines, perfect weather, and excitement for all age levels, Busch Gardens was a huge success and the perfect way to end spring break.        

Here's to great women . . .

May we know them

May we be them

May we raise them.

As soon as the doctor announced "It's a girl!" in the dimly lit ultra sound room, Steve and I began thinking of names for our sweet baby. We tossed around Olivia and Brooklyn, and the kids were dying for an Elizabeth. Knowing that this baby was our last, we wanted to choose a name full of meaning, hopefully a name that would help our daughter connect with positive role models and strong characteristics. For baby Mia, we chose Miriam Caroline, after three great women.  

Miriam Bentley Milne

From the moment I met Steve and his family sixteen years ago, I began hearing about his Grandma Milne. Grandma Milne was truly the center of the Milne family. She was devoted entirely to her children and grandchildren, her siblings and parents. I heard stories about Miriam caring for her baby sister, Maude, as if she were her own, since her mother's health was not good. I heard about her spending months sewing her sister's entire trousseau when she learned of her sister's engagement so that she would have a collection of nice clothing and house linens to begin her new home. Miriam spent summers in her backyard with her children and grandchildren, enjoying the family pool on almost a daily basis. While the children swam, she brought out gallons of homemade ice cream that she had mixing in the kitchen. She invited the entire family to their cabin or for holidays in St. George. Christmas at Grandma Milne's was magical, with an elegant dinner, a nutcracker waiting at each table setting, and a visit from Santa. It was an event that the family looked forward to all year. Miriam had an unshakable faith in Jesus Christ and the power of prayer, so strong that it was almost tangible to those close to her. She devoted her life to following the gospel and sacrificing wholeheartedly for each calling she received, from visiting teacher to being on the Board of the General Relief Society.  How lucky we are to have such an outstanding woman for whom to name our sweet baby.  

 Carol Crandall Spendlove

My earliest memories of my Grandma Carol are of her throwing family parties for her grandchildren. She always was wearing the latest fashions. I remember her baking individual sized pizzas at a granddaughter sleepover, in Gogo boots, a mini skirt and a beehive hairdo. She planned trips for the family to the cabin, Canyonlands and Jackson Hole and always invited us to bring our bikes and stay a few days in Dugway, where we could ride to the ice cream store down the street or the park around the corner. It wasn't only her family who felt at home with Grandma. Grandma opened her doors and her heart to everyone who came her way, including her children's friends and her neighbors in each new spot Grandpa and Grandma settled. It's no wonder that Grandma was the ward activities planner everywhere she went! Grandma is visionary and determined. She and Grandpa came from humble beginnings, but Grandma knew of Grandpa's potential. Grandma supported Grandpa as an undergraduate at BYU. When asked what her husband was doing in school, her response was always, "working on his Ph.D.", which was true , but he just had to earn his undergraduate and master's degree first! When her children were grown, Grandma became a realtor and soon bought several apartment buildings to run. Eventually she wrote a book on how to successfully be a landlord. Into her eighties, Grandma continues to write for the Church History Museum and stay active in various ways. Grandma Carol is a survivor. Her life hasn't always been easy but Grandma didn't let that hold her back. She has put aside her troubles and created a success story for herself, her husband and for her children. I have always felt blessed to have Grandma Carol as an example for myself and now for my children.

Caroline Romney Eyring

Several years ago, my mother gave me my matriarchal line in photos. Each time I look at the women from whom I have come, my gaze stops on Caroline Romney Eyring. I truly look forward to meeting this woman. Great Grandma Caroline is my Grandma Rose's mother. Despite having only an 8th grade education and living in humble circumstances, she was able to turn out one success story after another in her children. Recently, while reading my grandmother's life story, I came across a description of her mother:

I remember mother as a tremendously dynamic individual, the kind of person that makes the world go round. She wasn't, however, the most comfortable person to be around, because she felt that others, too, should be up and doing. There wasn't a lazy hair in her head and she tolerated no laziness in others, particularly her children. . . Mother did wonders with her love and affection. Though she had eight very individualistic children, she always had plenty of love to go round, and somehow she succeeded in making each one of us feel that we were extra special and the one most loved. . . Mother had the kind of faith and outlook on the world that I consider admirable. Her faith was so strong that I believe it could literally move mountains, yet it was so practical and genuine that even her most skeptical children could accept her way of thinking. . . I would be happy to be counted just one half as successful as Mother.

I believe that it was these characteristics that allowed Caroline to raise eight outstanding children, including Henry Eyring and Camilla Kimball. Grandma Caroline is one of the maternal figures who I have always admired most. Hopefully Mia will also look to Grandma Caroline as an example and source of strength.

I have always felt so grateful for two families full of great men and women by which to raise my children. My children have many examples of faith, love, service, determination, optimism and purpose by which to live their lives.      

It's Official . . .

Miriam Caroline Ebert

May 22, 2009

5:05 pm

8 lbs.  5 oz.

19.5 inches

Named after her great-grandmother Miriam Bentley Milne (Steve's grandmother), her great -grandmother Carol Crandall Spendlove (my grandmother), and her great-great grandmother Caroline Romney Eyring (my great-grandmother), we welcome baby Miriam into our world.    

Number Six

Baby Girl Ebert*

 First moments in our world 

*baby's name coming soon.

Don't Blink

This morning I walked into my laundry room, still shuffling and blurry eyed from last night's sleep. Draped over my stainless steel sink was Emilie's sundress, with laundry instructions intended for me. What happened to my baby? When did she learn what "cold wash" means and why does she care? I thought that my job was still to shout from the kitchen window to get out of the mud but somewhere along the way my job has changed. Through contacted eyes and braced teeth, my eleven year old daughter asks if I have made her annual doctor's appointment. She did just have her birthday she adds. Is her semi-annual dentist appointment coming up and have I sent in her junior high recommendations, she inquires. A word of caution to prospective mothers, first timers, aunts, uncles and most importantly to myself on the eve of the birth of my last addition to this fast paced world: Don't blink. In just a moment our babies grow tall and become our friends, just what we have always hoped for, but with no chance of ever turning back.  

Tender Mercies

Three weeks ago, on April 25th, I called my mom to check in on my dad's father, my grandpa Cliff, who was recovering from heart surgery. Mom sounded tired and explained that the doctors, who had worked so hard to restore my grandpa's body, had said that there really wasn't anything they could do for him. The option now was to just see what Grandpa's body could do to heal on its own. This didn't sound good , I thought. Despite the news, Grandpa was optimistic. He asked what he needed to do for the doctors to let him return home to recover. He even talked about making it to the family reunion in Florida at the end of June. Then the conversation turned to my mom's mother, Grandma Rose. She wasn't doing well either, I was told. Holding back tears I told my mom that I just might need to call back. I could only handle one gravely ill grandparent at a time. But I tried to be brave and listened to my mother describe the sudden turn in Grandma's health. Mom said that she needed more help, so they had lined up hospice to care for her. I don't know much about dying, but I do know that hospice is called in to help usher one from this life to the next. Once again, this didn't sound good. I clarified the role of hospice with my mother and she agreed that it was meant for the dying but mentioned that according to hospice, sometimes they do such a good job, the patient actually improves. 

Unfortunately neither my Grandpa Cliff nor my Grandma Rose improved. Grandpa died the next day and Grandma passed away just two days later. I felt like my entire life's landscape had changed. Who would lead the Spendlove side of the family, I wondered. Grandpa had been so strong and dynamic. And who would gather the Calder side of the family together. Even when she could barely walk, the family would congregate around Grandma in her family room to discuss politics, business and family matters. Would both sides of my family drift apart?

We rushed home to Salt Lake City just as fast as we could mobilize our five little ones. Unfortunately we didn't make it home in time to say our goodbyes to Grandma Rose, but we were embraced by family. We spent five days at various funeral and family events.

On Thursday night we spent the evening at Grandpa's viewing in St. George.

Friday was the funeral. All four siblings spoke, telling favorite stories, what they had learned from Grandpa and the impact he had had on many lives. Uncle Darrell spoke on behalf of the in-laws, relating the story of the baseball bat that Grandpa was given by Babe Ruth. I had the honor of speaking on behalf of the grandchildren. I talked about knowing that Grandpa was a hero in every sense of the word: in WWII, his career, and into retirement. However, I knew that what was most important to him was his family and that he played the role of grandfather so well. Grandpa was honored with the 21 gun salute for his sacrifice in WWII. It was inspiring to see fellow WWII soldiers who grandpa fought with solemnly present the salute and then respectfully bring the flag to Grandma Carol.  Afterwards the compassionate service committee hosted a lasagna dinner for our family.

On Saturday I met my mom and sister at Larkin Mortuary to dress my grandma and finalize funeral plans and flowers for Grandma Rose. Our family tried so hard to get home to see Grandma, only to call from our layover in JFK and learn of her passing. For some reason, being able to help take care of her one last time was meaningful to me. That night we met for dinner at the Mandarin Restaurant, our family gathering spot whenever there was an event to celebrate or an out of town family member to honor. We finished the night with dessert at Mom and Dad's house. 

On Sunday we met for another dinner with the Calder family at my parents' house. Mom put on a salmon dinner that flowed from the living room to the family room and out into her garden. With the Flindts in town from Seattle, our family home from Boston, Kent's family who is scattered everywhere from Washington D.C., San Francisco, Princeton and even Dubai in town, we cherished each moment together. At various family gatherings during the week, I thought often at how much happiness it would bring both Grandpa Cliff and Grandma Rose to know that their family loved, supported and cared about each other. 

Sunday night we all attended Grandma's viewing, mingling with her friends and family.

On Monday, which also happened to be Annelise's 7th birthday, both Grandpa Cliff and Grandma Rose had funerals in Salt Lake City. After taking Annelise out for breakfast for her birthday, we headed up to Capitol Hill for Grandpa's viewing and funeral. 

We then rushed over to Grandma Rose's church for her viewing and funeral. All three of Grandma's children spoke and the service ended with President Eyring, Grandma's nephew, speaking. The service was, like Grandpa Cliff's, inspiring, reminiscent and tender. Scott talked about how optimistic Grandma was. I think that this trait enabled her to live the adventurous, purposeful life that she lived. President Eyring spoke about Grandma's ability to make everyone feel that they had such great potential, better than they thought they were. I definitely felt this from Grandma. It was also interesting to hear of President Eyring's personal experiences knowing and loving his Aunt Rose as he grew up.

 We then attended the grave dedication of Grandma. Because Grandma was an Ensign in WWII, she too was presented with honors from the Navy, with two Naval Ensigns presenting the flag to my mother and one playing taps.

Grandpa Cliff's grave was just fifty feet from Grandma Rose's. Since we had missed his grave dedication due to Grandma's funeral, we had a small family service. A bag piper played and Lisa offered a family prayer. It was a beautiful day, with the burials shadowed by the Wasatch Mountains, blue skies above and cherry trees in full bloom all around us.

Although it was quite emotional burying two beloved grandparents on one day, I recognized the tender mercies and blessings we received. When we learned that my Grandma was only going to live a few more days, we were already in the process of returning to Utah. Although her passing was quicker than expected and we didn't make it back to hold her hands one last time, I was so grateful that we were able to attend both funerals with all of our children. During our planning, I kept hearing in my mind my Grandpa Cliff saying, like he said many times before, "You bring those children to me. I want to see your beautiful children!" I was so fortunate to have been able to bring each one of my children to say their last good-byes to both Grandpa Cliff and Grandma Rose.                      

A Grand Lady

Grandma Rose

1912 - 2009

Growing up, I always knew that my Grandma Rose was a legend in her own time. Whenever I needed the answer to anything, I could go to Grandma. She had been everywhere and done everything. 

Grandma was born into humble circumstances. She entered this world in a refugee camp in Texas, just across the Mexican border, after her family had been chased off their successful ranch by Mexican revolutionaries. She was one of 16 children, raised by a driven mother who expected nothing but success from all of her children. And successful she was. Grandma raced through school and started college at the age of 15.  While paying her own way, receiving the highest awards given, and participating in many activities, including being a student body officer, she still graduated from BYU at the age of 19. She received her master's degree at Columbia and then her Ph.D. at Berkley in English. During WWII, Grandma joined the Navy as a WAVE officer to help the war effort. 

She then held such responsible jobs as head of an Arizona congressman's office and personal assistant to the CEO of IBM in NY. Soon after, she became a professor of English at BYU. She married my grandfather at the age of 34 and had three children.

 

Grandpa and Grandma were professors at the U of U and BYU, respectively,

but soon were offered adventures they couldn't turn down. Administrative and teaching jobs took them to  Rangoon, Burma and later to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, with three young children in tow. They lived for several years in these obscure corners of the world, becoming, with their young children, truly citizens of the world. 

Grandma traveled to 145 countries in her life time, including such adventurous trips as driving in her own little red Mercedes from Cape Town, South Africa, straight through the middle of the continent to Cairo, Egypt in the 1960's. She continued to travel abroad into her 80's. It always amused me that often, after I mentioned that I had simply taken my children to a local museum or event, she would exclaim, "Oh Camille! How do you do it? You are going to wear yourself out!"  

Even when her legs could no longer carry her to obscure destinations, Grandma never turned down opportunities. Well into her 90's she continued teaching, visiting relief societies to give talks on various notable family members, as well as teaching in her own ward. She read passionately, with a goal of completing 100 books a year for the last 20 years of her life. 

Recently Grandma told me of receiving a phone call from a student who she taught at Globe High School almost 80 years ago. He had seen an interview of her that aired on TV and had to get in touch with Grandma to let her know that she was his most influential teacher. Clearly Grandma played many important roles to the people in her full world. However, to me, the role of grandma was most significant. 

Grandma helped raise me. I remember each Friday on my half days in elementary school, Grandma would take my sister and me on adventures. I still picture her at Ensign Elementary standing up on the door frame of her sky blue Mercedes, shouting "YOOHOO" and waving to me as the masses of children headed to the parking lot of find their mothers. She would whisk us away in search of any festival or tourist attraction in the Salt Lake Valley. We always anticipated the Fall Food Festival at the Salt Palace, where we would be given brown paper grocery sacks and could meander the aisles of product displays, collecting coupons and sampling new products. She would take us to the Kennecot Copper Mine to eye what seemed to be Tonka Toy trucks digging and dumping the earth a mile below the surface, or we would load into the elevators at the Church Office Building and zip to the top floor for a panoramic view of the city. Some of our favorite days were spent in her orchard, helping her pick raspberries and corn or building forts next to the small irrigation canal or in the twisted apple trees. Being the right gender and age, I suppose, Grandma soon expanded our adventures beyond the Utah borders. In third grade she took me on a tour of the deep South. I still remember her big yellow bag that held our treats and the Tang that she would stir up each morning. I remember exploring Cyprus groves in the Carolinas, Bourbon Street in New Orleans, and the halls of the Capitol in Washington D.C.

 However, I think that what my mother will always remember is Grandma's shocking comment that I was flirting with the men on the tour, especially the bus driver. "She must have gotten that from the other side of the family!" Grandma, who was much too practical to ever be flirtatious, proclaimed. Later Grandma introduced me to international travel, taking me through central Europe over my 11th birthday, a tour of the Balkans when I was in high school and finally a Russian cruise along the Volga River when I was in college. She took me on trips to California and Colorado and after I was married, annual trips to the Shakespearean Festival in Southern Utah.

I remember loving being with my grandma so much that, since she was the one who would take care of me when I was sick, I had a true incentive to distort each sniffle or minor ache into a serious bout with the flu or other ailment. Grandpa would meet me out at my mother's car and carry me into my grandma who would be waiting for me in the family room. The red polka dot sheets were always on the pull out couch. Grandma would feed me chicken noodle soup and orange juice and read me stories. How could I help but want to come back for more just a month or so later?   

At Grandma's funeral last week, President Eyring told of how his Aunt Rose always thought that he was better than he really was. The congregation laughed when he said that he hoped that someday before he saw my grandmother again that he really would be as good as she thought that he was. I too felt of Grandma's high expectations. As a teenager, when a rebellious streak ran through me, I remember never following through with my self destructive ideas because I knew that my grandma had much higher expectations of me. I never wanted to disappoint her. Somehow she always had a way of making me feel so loved and of having great potential.

Ever since I was a young girl, I knew that I wanted to name my first daughter after Grandma Rose. When Grandma was 85, we welcomed Emilie Rose into the world. I could think of no better role model for my precious daughter.

 

As Grandma got older and my family and responsibilities grew, our adventures together were limited to our annual birthday dinner for Grandma at the Lion House, lunch with the great grandchildren at Chuck-o-Rama and dinners in my mother's back yard or occasionally at the Mandarin or Olive Garden. 

Our family always looked forward to visiting Grandma. She wanted to know all of the details in my children's lives and what adventures we had been on. She clipped coupons, relevant motherhood articles and sometimes even ordered books for my children from book clubs that she belonged to. We never left her house without a candy bar for each child and several decorative pads of paper and stickers that came in the mail from charitable organizations that she donated to.

Although I am truly saddened by our loss, I temper my feelings by knowing that Grandma is once again free. I am sure that she is jumping at any opportunity that comes her way. I am so grateful to have been shaped by such a grand lady. I truly hope that her legacy lives on through her grandchildren and great-grandchildren, for thus we will all be better people.